The Sensitivity Doctor

Healing Codependency: Finding Safety Beyond the Drama Triangle with Kitty Chambliss

Episode Summary

In this episode of The Sensitivity Doctor, Dr. Amelia Kelley is joined by Kitty Chambliss, certified relationship coach and founder of Loving Without Boundaries, to explore the Drama Triangle—a model that illustrates toxic relationship roles such as Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer. Kitty introduces the Observer Triangle as a healthier alternative, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness, boundaries, and empowerment in all types of relationships, from open and non-traditional partnerships to more conventional ones. This insightful discussion provides valuable tools for recognizing codependency, overcoming dysfunctional patterns, and fostering meaningful connections through mindful communication and self-care.

Episode Notes

Key takeaways:

• The Drama Triangle highlights common toxic roles in relationships—Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer—that often stem from early life experiences and lead to conflict, blame, and resentment.
• Recognizing when you’re playing one of these roles is the first step in breaking free from unhealthy relationship cycles.
• Codependency often manifests in the Rescuer role, where individuals overextend themselves to fix others, leading to emotional exhaustion and stunted personal growth.
• The Observer Triangle offers a transformative approach:
  • Victim → Observer: Fosters self-awareness and mindfulness.
  • Persecutor → Asserter: Promotes healthy boundaries and respectful communication.
  • Rescuer → Nurturer: Provides support without enabling or sacrificing self-care.
• Establishing clear, respectful boundaries is essential for maintaining healthy relationships and prioritizing self-care.
• Practical tools like the HALT method (checking if you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired) help regulate emotions and shift interactions from drama to empowerment

Connect with Kitty Chambliss:
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Article by Lynne Forrest: The Three Faces of Victim – An Overview of the Victim Triangle